Dr. Amanda Aguilera
I'm Amanda, a wanderer at heart with a passion for supporting people in finding their way through life's twists, turns, conflicts, and transformations. I have over 17 years of experience in areas like psychotherapy, social power dynamics, and restorative justice-- along with a short lifetime of exploring the world's wisdom traditions. What I've come to is that the most powerful healing often happens when we connect with our inner wisdom and the natural world around us. (I think about the amount of time and money I could have saved if only I'd looked at the ground beneath me.)
As an adult, I've lived in different places across the globe, but I grew up in the South of the United States with a rural, conservative, Republican, Christian, military family. You could say the apple fell a little far from the tree. And I'm glad I came from that particular tree. I learned a lot about how people who seem very different actually aren't that different. And yet we harm each other so much for that misperceived difference. This has always distressed me. Either through experiencing or witnessing the many forms of rejection, manipulation, and exploitation of those of us who were considered "less than" - who were unseen or invisibilized.
About
Out of this distress, I have sought to appease or avoid it by studying in books, universities, and dojos, or meditating, dancing or traveling. Unfortunately, or fortunately, appeasing and avoiding didn't seem to make the distress go away.
I was told to keep turning toward the distress, the discomfort, or dissonance, but it felt overwhelming to do so. Most of modernity's societies and structures do not support the connection, space, and care required for such human work.
When I finally found what gave me the strength and flexibility to hold the distress, pain, or dissonance, it was through my relationship with what I call my rooted self. I became rooted in my personal power, the natural world, and with Spirit (what I call "the Something Larger").
And now I help others to do the same.
I support individuals and groups in their quest to connect with who they are, discover their natural gifts, and nurture their relationship with themselves, others, the natural world, and whatever they perceive as the "Something Bigger."
I specialize in guiding folks through internal and external conflict and complex relationships (queer and poly folx, you're very welcome here!). I'm passionate about promoting liberatory frameworks (and urge other 1:1 practitioners to do the same). My practice is all about power-consciousness and using mindfulness and compassion to tap into your basic goodness and inherent belongingness.
When I'm not working with clients, you can find me co-leading Sacred Wayfinding with my partner Steph, where we blend spiritual practices with practical tools for self-discovery.
At home in Wheat Ridge, Colorado, I'm part of a blended family with three awesome kids. And when I get some sacred alone time, you'll catch me with my nose in a book, taking a long walk in the woods or along a creek, or getting crafty.
If you're ready to embark on your own journey of healing and growth, let's chat!
I offer a free 30-minute 1:1 Intro session to see if we might be a good fit for working together.
“Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. . . Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.”
Pema Chödrön
Formative/Transformative Moments
Rather than a CV or resume, I thought that offering my most formative and transformative moments or decisions would be more insightful about who I am and what I can offer.
Being born to loving parents. They weren't perfect, but they tried every day to meet my siblings and me where we were.
Growing up in a spiritual community. Even though I have some spiritual developmental delays from growing up in the church, and I don't practice the religion of Christianity anymore, I'm grateful to have been raised within a community that was caring and nudging me in the direction of Spirit.
Having a queer youth minister in high school. She wasn't out to us at the time, and her queerness had little to do with the giant impact she had on us teenagers, but she introduced me to my favorite music group (still to this day), the Indigo Girls, and implicitly encouraged me in the direction of queer community.
Being the token "social justice activist" at Texas Christian University and having more mentors than I can name. It was the first time I realized that my independent thinking was a gift and that tokenization is a bypass.
Moving to India at the age of 21 to study the interplay between social justice and religion. I was there for a year with LIU, studied (a lot), got dysentery, discovered yoga, was physically assaulted, and it was the first time I "cliff-jumped" to follow my intuition.
Learning from indigenous people and in indigenous communities. I have been fortunate that my path inadvertently lead me to learning with curanderos in multiple countries and in places like Takiwasi, and having deep friendship with indigenous individuals. Of the many things I've done to try to decolonize my mind, being immersed in ways that were never colonized away from the natural world was/is the most significant.
The choice to and the experience of studying and practicing martial arts for most of my adult life. I could not put into words the amount of healing, transformation, and growth I have gotten from the practice of To Shin Do.
Getting my Master's degree in Contemplative Psychotherapy from Naropa University. I will be forever grateful for the guidance to examine my own mind before I attempted to support others with theirs.
Being diagnosed with a chronic illness. This taught me (and still teaches me) how precious and delicate our human bodies are.
Giving birth and raising children. Becoming a parent is the single-most transforming moment of anyone's life, I think. It completely changed my focus.
Being a single mom. I've included this as a separate point because it significantly shaped my understanding of myself and my capabilities. It transformed my capacity and developed my personal power. And it was the single hardest thing I've ever done.
Finishing my Doctorate of Psychology as a single mother of a toddler. Ok, maybe this was the single-hardest thing I've ever done. At least this is one of my proudest moments.
Beginning my annual practice of wilderness vigils and the guidance from my Soulskin siblings. I would name these vigils as the most important transformative periods of my life.
Finding and choosing an intimate partnership that is mutually loving and supportive. I did not believe that someone could have a "person" until I found mine at the age of 42.
Realizing I have AuDHD. What a relief!
Mentoring and succession planning with Dr. Cedar Barstow. In attempting to carry on and build upon her legacy at the Right Use of Power Institute, I've had to confront the most subtle and complex of power dynamics and step into leadership in new ways.
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